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I am so glad that I got Bicycle's black cards, their Ellusionist Shadow Masters line. It really does spice up my Solitaire-y life. While I am in the mood to write stuff down: I also recently bought a checkbook-size magnetic chess set, which is proving to be another source of joy. I can play games and variations on it as I lie down or sit in a comfy arm chair, holding it like a small book. Working on chess problems is a very satisfying way for my mind to drift over time, especially when making money and finding love is not a real option.
This is a good time for these treats to fall my way, too. I am afraid that I had fallen into a seniors' slump, a hard depression. Thinking about how I dropped that 5-gallon water jug and how hard it was for me to run in place on that one day, I realized that this is the year when it became official: I am an old man. Even if I wanted to work out now, to pick up my strength, I suspect that my body can no longer even build muscle. And although I am no longer suffering the 3 a. m. sweats, I still carry the burden of knowing that I failed about as much as it is possible to fail at life. Forget about finding love, I never even made a friend, nor have I ever held a real job in my life. And, in my old age, I know that nothing can be done about it now. It's done.
This is a good time for these treats to fall my way, too. I am afraid that I had fallen into a seniors' slump, a hard depression. Thinking about how I dropped that 5-gallon water jug and how hard it was for me to run in place on that one day, I realized that this is the year when it became official: I am an old man. Even if I wanted to work out now, to pick up my strength, I suspect that my body can no longer even build muscle. And although I am no longer suffering the 3 a. m. sweats, I still carry the burden of knowing that I failed about as much as it is possible to fail at life. Forget about finding love, I never even made a friend, nor have I ever held a real job in my life. And, in my old age, I know that nothing can be done about it now. It's done.
