Tuesday Morning

I passed my five days, and I have been ... rather distracted this morning.

I'll relate a dream from a few nights ago. I am not sure why I have not been inclined to write it down. It is not the most trivial of my dreams. It starts out with me at home. I need to go somewhere for a trip. I am running late. The bus will be here in a few minutes. As I rush out, mother tells me that I should pack a bag, but I have no time and I say it's alright. The scene cuts to my destination. It looks like I'm on a football team, and we are going on a road game. Oddly, we are not very young. We do not seem like high school kids. However, this had been a recurring dream in younger days, and I guess my subconscious dream manufactory is just freely smashing stuff together. I am regretting that I did not bring my stuff. I see one black guy with his bag, and I ask him, "Do you have your cleats?" He holds up his bag. Of course, he has his cleats. My mind is vainly trying to save myself and come up with escape scenarios, but I have no time for a trip back home, and I know people are not going to go to the great trouble of buying me what I need. I resign myself to the fact that I am not going anywhere. Loser, again. If there is a message, it seems like one of the more obvious ones. I just do not have the stuff I need to play.

Fever

Yesterday, when I faced a big mow, I complained about feeling week and soft. Although this was a reasonably honest statement, I hoped I was exaggerating a little bit. However, I am really feeling it today. My muscles feel as though they 'believe' they are suffering a serious illness driving me to bed-rest. Just walking across the room feels like an iffy proposition. Yet, I am not suffering any other symptoms, no nose problems, nor cough problems. I suppose you could say that I have a little case of fever. I cannot recall this sort of thing happening. Maybe it's just rare and my memory isn't so good. I hope that I am not coming down with something and the worst has yet to hit me.

* * *

1350

Man, I don't even feel up to my wank. I'd prefer to wait for a better day. This could be serious.

* * *

1530

Getting worse. I feel it in my head more. Feeling weaker, too. I am wondering how to handle my reading. All I feel up for is lying down and dozing, or else sitting back on the couch and watching Netflix.

God, I am glad that I took care of the mowing already. Though, I wonder if that is what has knocked me into this loop.

* * *

1730

Pop came home with some tamales, and although I would ordinarily think that might be too rich and risky for me to eat at this point, it was closing in on snack time, and I was kind of hankering for something non-sweet. They seem to have gone done alright. I trust they will stay down.

* * *

2150

This bug has stuck with me all day and all evening. For a while there, I was actually enjoying it, liking the ability to just lie in bed and burn, not even needing to have a TV or radio on, but being able to simply lie there and doze. However, I am already tired of it. When I wake up tomorrow morning, I hope I am over the hump of whatever this is. I am thinking of it as a 'dry virus', being free of nose and cough problems while in every other way feeling like one has been struck down by a bad virus.