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Mother and Jack
A nasty little dream ... My subconscious seems to be counteracting my recent bout of sentimentality toward mother. She, Jack, and I are in bed, perhaps watching TV. Mother tries to push me off the bed. At one point, I tricked her and positioned myself so that she missed me and ended up falling off the bed herself. Then Jack took over trying his best to kick me off the bed, but although I was taking some pretty hard thumps through the bedding, I found it more amusing than anything else. Mother was not laughing, though. Her mood got ugly, even sinister, and she made one of those evil threats, something like she was going to break my bones to a powder, and speaking quite seriously in a low, menacing tone.
Funny, that this should come back to me now. It captures so well and fully the deepest, darkest, dankest depths of our malignant triangle: mother, half-brother, and me. I was rather hoping that this toxic emotional history was behind me. It has been a long time. If anything, I was hoping that my dreams and reflections might start capturing the better turns of our lives together, from when Jack and I were children and he loved me. Now this dream comes up, making me feel naive and stupid. There are a lot of poisonous weeds and evil serpents among those old memories. My life just never really had a lot going for it. I don't have a lot to look to with fond smiling affection, not unless it had four legs and answered to 'Bo'.
Funny, that this should come back to me now. It captures so well and fully the deepest, darkest, dankest depths of our malignant triangle: mother, half-brother, and me. I was rather hoping that this toxic emotional history was behind me. It has been a long time. If anything, I was hoping that my dreams and reflections might start capturing the better turns of our lives together, from when Jack and I were children and he loved me. Now this dream comes up, making me feel naive and stupid. There are a lot of poisonous weeds and evil serpents among those old memories. My life just never really had a lot going for it. I don't have a lot to look to with fond smiling affection, not unless it had four legs and answered to 'Bo'.